I am well enough, better than well enough, to return to this forum for my thoughts.
When I could not walk, needing crutches or a God sent scooter to get around [my good left leg pushed while I rested my right knee on the scooter’s seat]; when I suffered such severe pain that I could only play music through headphones to comfort me, or sleep; then I had no desire to write. I barely had desire to live.
Now the pain is not constant, just a nagging reminder when I walk. I yearn to walk again without pain; and am hopeful that one day I will. Now my mind is clear and filled with things to write, things which I believe are worth reading.
Let me begin with this:
I too once seemed invincible,
nothing could touch me. I was innocent.
I worked, loved my work of teaching
helping people change their lives;
I gardened everyday, after work;
I was strong in all the ways
that humans need strength – body, mind, soul.
I was greatly loved and I mightily returned
her love.
I thought we would process our cares and thoughts,
process our way to bliss, forever.
My life seemed set and secure.
She died unexpectedly
and I was left heartbroken and mute
my breath knocked out of my being.
Now, pain and years later, I am again invincible.
Not in the ways of the innocent,
those who haven’t yet lost their hearts, their souls;
those who haven’t faced death.
No, now in the way of the wise am I invincible.
In the way of ones who have felt the deepest pain
the deepest hurt the deepest loss…
and decide to laugh and sing and give Praise
despite, in spite of it all.
I am again strong and secure and know
that I can bear and accept with grace
what comes in my life unknown.
And joyously sing: Thank You for another day
another opportunity to love your Creation.